Optimism

I had this deep fear of the future. I had a plan, and constantly feared the thought that it wouldn't follow through.
If it didn't meet my expectations, basically I would just die, rather than live with the disappointment of unachievement.

This fear doesn't consume me anymore. I am chill. I am hopeful; not only for the future I hope to happen but for the future that inevitably will. Either outcome, maybe it won't be so bad.

Is this happiness?

Is a relaxed attitude, with streaks of optimism, what they call serenity?

I am an independent person. I am self sufficient, not only with finances or my home, but with my lifestyle. I do not need company to do what I want. My plans for the day are not ruined when someone bails. So I would have thought that my levels of happiness would not have been dependent on another human being, and yet here I find myself in an ocean of bliss because of that very reason.

Life is better when you find that someone, let me tell you. That someone you just click with; makes you laugh; where you feel you can truly be yourself.
I feel authentic. I feel genuine. I feel excited for each day.
I still have fears for the future, of course. But at least now I feel that if things don't meet quite how I had expected, maybe it will be okay.