Bon Voyage

Grand changes have happened in my life, that's for sure. 

I now live on the opposite side of the country. Melbourne. Honestly, before packing up my entire life and moving 4,000kms away, I had never ever been to Melbourne. 

I had my reservations about the place. Sure, there is an abundance of culture, arts and festivities that I certainly admire and respect, unlike my home city which lacks thereof. But from my understanding, there are few natural attractions in Melbourne. Not to mention their infamous weather.

So, why then did I move, you ask?

Well, that's a good question. To say this year has been difficult wouldn't be wrong. There were more losses than wins, in more aspects of my life than work and dislocated-elbows. But there were still a lot of little wins. Sure, my wins weren't obvious and likely passed-by completely unnoticed by the majority of people. But that's okay, because I more than likely missed their little wins, too.

I guess my move was a result of many little things. But it wasn't a sad move, nor a desperate one. Actually, I think it was one of the most rational decisions I'd made all year. Not to mention the timing seemed almost too good to be true, and if my friend already living in Melbourne hadn't been looking for a housemate when I spontaneously messaged her - half joking, half not - it would have been only a passing thought; nothing more. 

I didn't feel bad about my life. There were many aspects I wanted to change, but isn't there always? But I was happy. A lot of things this year has led me to find a deep sense of peace and tranquility in myself; a confidence in myself and the universe; a detached outlook comprised of wisdom, acceptance and love; a passion for my life that is free from the mental burdens of society and expectation. I've hit rock bottom enough times to know that eventually, everything works out. It's not the first time and it certainly won't be the last. But I can get through anything. Why not take a leap and try something new? 

I've been in Melbourne for one and a half weeks now. It is better than I thought or imagined, but the novelty of the whole ordeal wore off within hours. It kinda felt like your birthday and how you have these hopes for it and want it to feel special, but it doesn't. There's still too much normalcy. And I'm not saying that in a bad way - more like a content way. It's kind of like I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. A city won't change much unless you make it. 

The Great Australian Bight, SA

The best part, aside from spending time with my good friends located here, was the trip itself. What was supposed to be a plane ride ended up being a 6-day drive. After an incident involving a kangaroo (he was fine) on a camping trip with my sister that rendered my car significantly damaged, although thankfully still drivable, the freight became more expensive and wallah. I decided to drive. By myself. Across the Nullarbor. And I swear on the seven seas, those were some of the best days of my life. 

Great Ocean Road, VIC

I had already known that I love my own company. I love exploring. And I absolutely love going at my own pace. But I had never camped by myself before. I had never taken a trip that was more than a few hours away. I had never spent six consecutive days alone, aside from the brief but warm conversations with fellow campers and shop attendants.  

A lot of people told me not to drive. "It's too far," they said. And then they laughed at me when I argued, "I have to do this," like some sort of martyr. 

Sure, it isn't exactly an ideal pilgrimage, but who sets the ideals for such journeys, anyway? A trip to the grocery store can be a pilgrimage with the right mindset. And I had the right mindset. 

Though most days consisted of nothing more than endless driving, and at times I felt concern  when I caught myself in the middle of a full-blown conversation with my car (we really bonded), but the open road, quiet nights, and pondering by the fire; I have truly never felt more free. 

And now I know how it feels to be truly happy.

Turns out I had it within me all along.