Thursday, 3 November 2016

That Unfortunate Age

We are at that age where we have begun the first steps of gaining complete independence and are laying down the ground work for our 'bright' futures. However, the  light in this so called future may be starting to dim.

At the beginning of our journey after leaving High School, our dreams were only a short few years away. With enough hard work they would be definite.
But we are coming to that age where we realize it is all much harder than we originally anticipated. The courses we are studying suddenly don't connect with us anymore. My great job that I have is starting to seem difficult to keep and the more I try to move up and forward the harder it becomes. 

One of my good friends has just had a slight breakdown. She has been studying a course at university for two years and she feels that her heart is no longer in it, nor has her heart been in it for a long time. But she has stayed put, stressing over upcoming exams and trying to find time for her massive workloads whilst battling her anxiety because she has already invested so much time in it.
But now she is beginning to wonder what happens if she does finish her course? And does get a job within that field? Will she be unhappy and stay put in her job that she hates because so much time and effort has already gone into it?

I worked with a girl who was 25 years old - 6 years older than me. She was smart, excelled in school but never went to university because she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. 
She instead worked full time, earning money, and perhaps it was the unfortunate events that happened in her life that opened her up to the world of nursing, that she finally found what she wanted to do.
She went to university at 22 years old, which in society's eyes is quite old to further her education. She completed her degree whilst continuing to work full time. She dedicated herself to the hard times and much effort it took because she knew what she wanted to do, and her heart was in it the entire time.
She's very happy now, with a job she loves and a degree in her pocket that she is extremely proud of and enjoyed the journey trying to achieve it. 

It is sad that society has made us believe we must choose and study straight after high school in the hopes to get a good paying job that will allow us to buy a house and pay for a mortgage until the day we die. Yet apart from perhaps seeing that job on television or from word of mouth, we have very little understanding of what exactly is expected of us when we pursue it. 

I chose to take the job road in order to gain experience and earn money. Sometimes I really hate my job and quite frankly, I don't see myself staying in this industry forever. It's stressful and I get pushed around by those older than me. But I will gain experience and knowledge and money to travel the world, until I finally know how I want to make a living and will do anything I can to achieve it. 

I told my friend not to stress. Take time off. A year maybe. Do mini courses consisting of six classes of a random subject. Find her hobbies and find her talents. There is absolutely no rush. And it will be far worse to be stuck in a job you hate than to have lived and had experiences and finally find the job for you five or ten years later than others. It's not about the destination, after all.
And maybe after that time away from the stress she may find that she was in the right place after all, but perhaps she wasn't in the right time. 

We have our entire lives to find what makes us happy. I know that some lives are shorter than others But if I were to die today, I would at least like to know that I didn't push myself past the limit to do something I hated in order to get to the place that I should be for a future that never came. 

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